Showing posts with label deployment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label deployment. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Courage...

is the ability to confront fear, pain, risk/danger, uncertainty or intimidation.  "Physical courage" is courage in the face of physical pain, hardship, death, or threat of death.

So stumbling bumbling along through deployment would be classified physical courage.  I give major props to those families that have a deployment over a year.  I salute those who have lost loved ones to this never ending hell.

I had this blog all typed out in my noggin before I made it to the keyboard.  Like clockwork now that I have made it to the keyboard, nothingHere I sit here staring at my blank screen yet again.

Every time I start to type, my mind would became flooded with previous jolly memories of holidays past.  Never were the gifts that important.  Nor the food or decorations. Pass on Santa Claus and the Christmas music. It's all about the time and fun I have while spending it with loved ones.  That's what's missing this year. I've had nobody to be my partner in crime for oh about, well a while now.


My physical courage is to beat this deployment hands down, while staring fear in its giant ugly face.
  
I will leave you with some quotes of courage.

  • Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.  ~Ambrose Redmoon
  •  Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.  ~Winston Churchill
  • Courage doesn't always roar.  Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.  ~Mary Anne Radmacher 
  • Courage is being afraid but going on anyhow.  ~Dan Rather
  • Courage is doing what you're afraid to do.  There can be no courage unless you're scared.  ~Edward Vernon Rickenbacker
  • Sometimes the biggest act of courage is a small one.  ~Lauren Raffo
  • Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.  ~C.S. Lewis
  • The courage of life is often a less dramatic spectacle than the courage of a final moment; but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy.  ~John F. Kennedy
 
 My favorite quote.
  •  Fear and courage are brothers.  ~Proverb 

Sunday, December 19, 2010

And Go...

They say the first impression is always the lasting impression.  I was never any good at that, never.  Pigs would fly before I leave a lasting first impression.  I am the shy, quiet type, that is until you get to know me.  Then I do believe most people would not want to know me (kidding).  Yup this is harder than I thought it would be, but I think I can do it.

The holiday season is just not the same when your partner is missing.  The only thing I have decorated is stockings, a nativity scene, and the count down to Christmas.  I have a few presents and I haven't even had the heart to wrap them.  New Years Eve I will have no one to share that midnight kiss with to ring in the New Year.  My partner will be 7,494.89 miles away from home.

Anyways enough of that pity party.  So on a happier note this deployment is almost over.

Why must our feelings be so complicated?  I can be happy as a clam and then down in the dumps the very next second.  BLAH.  Hey at least I guess complicated feels are better than none, gives me the feeling of being human stuck on this beautiful planet living my chaotic life.


So sitting on the couch staring off in a daze, I've been having a lot of thoughts about the future.  Just a bunch of passing thoughts.  Many of them questions and many just thoughts, but yet all so confusing.  HELP!  Sometimes I feel like Harry from Something's Gotta Give (2003) when they are in Paris during the birthday scene (Erica and Julian hold hands till after Harry says "make a wish") the oh my goodness I just realized I love this woman so much and she is in love with someone else, if I love her this much and she is so happy I will let her go.  Not really sure if that made any sense.  The sudden realization.

Wow another pity party.  See like I said, up and down.  Sitting here listening to music has made me realize that I could have done something better with me life.  No, no, no I am not cracking myself, well maybe, but I am happy with the way my life is turning out so far (ask me again in 5 years I might have changed my mind).  But truly, I  enjoy my life as if I were on a cool autumn Sunday stroll in the park you always see in the movies.  Where the trees line the edge of the path.  The path that is big enough to fit three cars down, with the benches on both sides ever spaced so evenly.  In other words, the place you go to escape this chaotic world and feel at peace.  I am at peace with where I am in my life.

❦Rochelle

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